I hate that thing some people do where it's like. "I left my wallet on the table to see if you'd say anything" or "I wanted to see if you'd wash the car if I stopped doing it"

Cause like

I dont know about anyone else

But I am perpetually hovering three inches above the strong subconscious belief that everyone knows what they're doing at all times except me, so if you change your normal patterns and I notice, then I will assume it is an intentional choice with a thought-out plan behind it and I will avoid interfering

And if I don't notice, because I won't, because why would I, because not much bothers me and if you don't say anything to indicate you are bothered then how would I KNOW

Alternatives to experimenting on me like a lab rat when you suspect me of being inconsiderate:

and btw to every gay or transgender person out there whos gritting their teeth through the holidays rn just know that in the future you may instead be sitting with your fiance making cookies together with homemade mimosa and brunch so if whatever it takes for you to survive now is in fact worth it and a better future is waiting for you. it is not impossible and you will make it

"women are tainted by their previous sexual encounters" doesn't become less openly misogynistic just because it's said by a woman btw

it is really weird what like. 4 years perspective on something you believed fully to your core will do

“yeah disappointment and heartbreak when plans or friends or romance doesnt work out hurt me too badly so now i just dont do that stuff or really hope for anything or get invested in anyone/anything anymore that way i can be surprised by nice happy things and bad stuff is just expected”

and my roommate at the time looked horrified and said “thats bad Bee??? thats so sad” and i didnt know what to say because id thought what i said was normal/a positive coping mechanism

btw this is, in my instance, the result of autistic burnout and childhood neglect. if you get so used to your needs and expectations not being met you learn to not have them because it is your only means of survival.

some people get angry and express their pain and are called ‘difficult’, some people shave themselves away until theres barely anything left and disappear to become ‘easier’. learning that disappearing to be easier on those around me was not kindness but, meaningless self destruction was a core part of learning how not to die.

its important to me that all y'all know that mannertee has an arch nemesis

his name is Ikanzame and he's a shark with bad driving etiquette!!

ikanzame!!! your people of virginia desire you carnally!!!!

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HOW TO TURN OFF GOOGLE AI in GMAIL:

I just want to make sure that everyone is aware that even if you turn this off, Google is still scanning all of that information, and from 2004 to 2017 they did it to serve you ads instead of training AI.

Google cheerfully reads your emails and looks at your photos and watches your videos and it always has and always will.

Don't bother turning off Gemini, for the love of fuck please just stop using Google.

(Protonmail is a good free, privacy forward option. Don't bother with Hotmail or Outlook, Microsoft reads your emails too. Also email is inherently insecure don't trust sensitive information to email)

In the Countryside I Saw a Ghost "On a hot summer evening in the countryside of Vietnam, my father was followed home by something... It told him that from now on, the voice in his head would no longer be his own." i did these drawings a few months ago for a dance/performance project my friend was developing...

autumn/winter affirmations:

After years of living in the adulting world, I think I’ve come to a realization: Manners exist to guide you to good conduct even when you’re in a bad mood.

When you’re happy, when you’re feeling generous, when you’re pleased with your gift or your service or your outcome, it’s easy to be nice. It’s easy to tip the waiter well when you’ve had a good day. It’s easy to thank the teller or the clerk when you got what you wanted out of the transaction. It’s easy to smile and chit-chat with strangers on the road when you’re in a good mood.

It’s hard to tip the waiter when you didn’t enjoy your food. It’s hard to thank the clerk for their time when you’ve just been told there’s a problem with their account and they weren’t able to fix it for you. It’s hard to think of something nice to say when your aunt gave you a crappy sweater you neither need nor want. It’s hard to be nice to people when you’ve had a shitty day. It’s HARD.

That’s what manners are for. Scripts and phrases that you learn by rote to say when you can’t think of a single nice or good thing to say from your own volition. Yes, they’re scripted. Yes, the sentiment is empty. But the scripts work in every situation, and the emptiness provides a buffer between your own unhappiness and the rest of society.

Because most of the time, it’s not the waiter’s fault that the food you ordered wasn’t what you expected. It’s not the clerk’s fault that your account is overdrawn. It’s not the fault of the barista or the stranger on the subway that you got fired today or your favorite aunt died. But even when you can’t summon a smile or a cheery word, you can still have manners, because they will serve you the same in sunshine or rain.

This is very wise and very well put.

are you saying to live like an npc

it sounds like you’re suggesting to live like a non playable character.

I am not kidding even a little bit when I say that if you are equating civil and humane behavior with subhuman status, that is a problem you need to fix with yourself.

does anyone know if we have transmasc and transfem love and friendship today

We do. And tomorrow and the next day and every day forever and ever and ever too. :)

a long time ago i was struggling with being transmasc because i felt like i was betraying womanhood somehow. then one of my best friends came out as a trans woman and i realised "ah... there will always be so many beautiful women in the world, so it's okay that i'm not one of them". what i'm trying to say is you need to love each other or there's no point to any of this

in a reversal of this. when i came out as transfem i was almost dissapointed because i spent so long trying to be a truly good man. i was raised with a lot of shitty guys so i tried to be the most pro-feminist comfortable dude i could be for the women around me. when my egg cracked, i almost felt this feeling of "shit, are the only men who think like this secretly women inside?" and it feels nice to see that proven so utterly and completely wrong by the trans men i know in my life. i love seeing people take on the masculinity i hated and do amazing shit with it, god bless trans dudes

I want to own a house and have a garden in the back and a fruit tree in front and I want to tell the neighborhood kids that they can come pick the fruits when they want as long as they leave some for others, and I want to host dinners for friends and make too much food and make everyone go home with some leftovers, and I want to grow vegetables in my garden and beg my neighbors to take all this zucchini off my hands or I'll have to eat zucchini for every meal for the next few months, and I want to give and feed and love but I need more goddamn money first

But Orpheus always looks back...

What fuckin timeline are we living in

(gift link)

My city is teaming with ICE. I don’t want to write too much about it online so I’m asking you to trust me.

In my city, the ICE agents are always in plainclothes-sunglasses and hoodies up. They arrive in unmarked cars and always as a surprise attack. It’s eerie and unsettling. Here is an example of the cars used by ICE agents on Friday. These cars were verified by community advocates.

If you are in Massachusetts and think you see ICE in your neighborhood, contact LUCE. They will send out US Citizens out into the community to verify reports. We all have to help each other because shit is dark.

With what's being done to Snap benefits--food stamps--this month, and Thanksgiving coming up, I think it's a really good time to give what you can to food pantries. With the reminder that money is always better than giving food, because the pantry is able to make that money go further and knows what they actually need.

@stvksn on ig

I hope your god has asked for your mercy. I hope youve refused to forgive him.

i love this more and more every time i see it.

I have so much love for this person. The amount of empathy it takes to have these considerations about a person you will never meet, the eloquence and conviction with which they speak, the contempt for landlords. Sometimes I see something someone writes or creates and I wish with everything in me that I could meet and talk to that person for hours about what caused them to be this kind of light in the universe. This is one of those times.

Y'all for real please do these. Even if you're certain your posture doesn't suck. One day you will wake up with impinged shoulder pain like I did and let me tell you it fucking HURTS. Do these exercises even just once a week and it will make such a difference. Especially my fellow creatives out there, stop shrimping over your work and go do these right now. RIGHT NOW.