i think about the bats being on gotham socials all the time. dick and jason are so glad that they were robin before the time that everyone had a high quality camera with internet access in their pockets bc there would be so many embarrassing videos out there of them. have you ever gone running with a 6'3 man when you're only 4'9? It's extremely undignified. you are not keeping up. see you at the arrest batman dont mind me i'll be taking 5 steps for every one of yours.

there's a video somewhere (twitter? youtube) that Jason loves dearly that's of nightwing booking it after some goon with Batman pelting behind them and then robin (tim) bringing up the rear pretty far back. and the videographer is hollering at him "MAN YOU NEED A 5 HOUR ENERGY! PICK UP THE PACE HUP HUP HUP HE'S GETTING AWAY HUP HUP HUP GET THOSE KNEES UP MAN!!!" and then as robin keeps lagging behind (because he is 5'1, and simply does not have the legspan to keep up) the videographer goes "AW DUDE IT'S ALRIGHT... YOU AINT NEVER GONNA CATCH THEM JUST GO SIDDOWN... GO GET A BATBURGER MAN..." and then they start to lower their camera and they say quietly "man it's making me sad just lookin at him" and the video ends. jason searches it up at least once a month and laughs until he cries.

extremely funny to me that Kermit the Frog is the only main overlap character between Sesame Street and The Muppets. imagine your day job is hanging out in a community of lovely people that genuinely just want to help kids learn and care about everyone so so much and then your night job is the reason that you have to stay up to date on your rabies AND tetanus vaccine

at noon the giant you're hanging out with is Big Bird! a wonderful fellow who likes reading stories and singing and telling fun facts! at midnight there's a giant named Sweetums who makes you feel like you're being hunted for sport

Ernie, trying to maybe come out to Kermit: well you know Kermit, me and Bert-

Bert: Bert and I

Ernie: Bert and I, we've been best friends forever, but we're also something else too!

Kermit, who every goddamn night has to tell Beaker and Bunsen to keep it professional, deal with Statler and Waldorf's bullshit, AND update his organizational chart on Dr. Teeth and the Electric Polycule: that's really great to hear fellas, happy for you two! :)

the only thing you really have to understand about geoff rickly is that he was created in a lab to be your weird as fuck eccentric high school english teacher who is mercilessly mocked and psychologically tortured by most of the class because he’s a very easy target but dearly adored by the kids who are about to figure out they’re trans because he is also deeply lovable and has a face you could come out to. and he was one semester away from becoming exactly this when the universe took a left turn and he accidentally became a rockstar who influenced the direction of an entire subculture of music. and ever since then the universe has been trying to make up for this little mishap by punishing him with a series of misfortunes almost poetic in their magnitude. he IS the tragic postmodern protagonist he should be trying to critically analyse with bunch of unenthusaistic sixteen-year-olds who only know how to deal with their unfortunate crush on him by bullying him.

4pm on a Friday after surviving yet another week being called Mr Dickly

imagine you are jack quaid. or karl urban. or anthony starr. and nepo cast member pretty boy ackles is in cahoots with the creator of your show. he is able to bring in his frat brother and frat lover from that one shit show that can't seem to die. you want to say something but gay people would crucify you.

since I just saw @outdiaz talking about it on the dash, I also want to come out and say that I'd still give absolutely anything for Eddie to fuck the priest. It'd just be so inspired to have him develop rapid onset erectile dysfunction after finding out Marisol's a nun but then bang a priest like it's nobody's business. character of all time.

The littlest things we know to be small = debut literary fiction

The dark wife: thriller, adapted into a Hulu original

The mailman’s niece = historical fiction

The mailman of Warsaw = also historical fiction but about war

The gate of wind = fantasy

The gate of wind and bones = young adult fantasy

A gathering of pelicans = mystery, part of a long running series that takes up a whole shelf at the library

The Group Project Partner Gambit = romance with a cartoon cover

Wendy Jenkins is Scared of Commitment = romance with a cartoon cover of gay people

this is my magnum opus

if i was a celebrity who knew other celebrities i’d do this all the time i’d intentionally trawl the underbelly of the internet to find this kind of weird shit to send them

i cant believe steve harvey just outed eddie diaz

Eddie going “Truth!” and somewhere his teenage child cringed in embarrassment and doesn’t know why.

if i just recently was in a coma after falling (getting pushed) out of a window in some dusty fucked up old house I apparently own now, and then some faggy army man started ordering me to leave and then singing gilbert and sullivan musicals directly in my ear?? I would never forgive his gay ass.

👆kitty higham spech bubble

my favorite thing about robert sean leonard is his career trajectory was clearly supposed to be Vaguely-Known But Respected Serious Theater Actor and instead he made ten million dollars on Fox by repeatedly putting his hands on his hips and sighing in a gay way

he's like the american michael sheen if michael sheen had no work ethic

youtube lofi girl dropping bops these days

I love Derek teen wolf he’s the funniest man ever created. And I’ve seen many a funny man penned to page. It’s becuase he has the worst life in the world and zero charisma but looks like Tyler hoechlin. Will you be my buddy please ass character. Don’t mind me just doing my chin-ups in my house ravaged by fire that is falling apart with blackened half crumbled walls. Remember when they tried to make him cool by giving him a teenage leather jacket gang but his leather jacket gang were all losers supreme and only hung out with him because they had to. Zero family zero friends zero social skills 7 different ab exercise routines.

Like you would think if a man’s entire family burned to death by fire and then his only remaining family member was ripped in half people would know this about him and then in a hushed whisper be like. Let’s be civil with Derek. Let’s all agree to make polite conversation with Derek due to the fact that all of his family were tragically murdered by the woman who groomed him. I know he’s a bit strange and offputting but you know the tragedy he’s coping with a tragedy you don’t have to like him just be polite because of the tragedy. But instead they’re all GAWD I have to go fucking TALK TO DEREK. Kicks rock. Man I can’t believe I drew the short straw and have to go talk to Derek.

Joseph's brothers would have sold him to One Direction

And it came to pass, when Joseph was come unto his brethren, that they stript Joseph out of his coat, his coat of many colours that was on him;

And they took him, and cast him into a pit: and the pit was empty, there was no water in it.

And they sat down to eat bread: and they lifted up their eyes and looked, and, behold, a company of youths came from London with their entourages bearing black jeans, blazers and eyeliner, carrying it for the stage.

And Judah said unto his brethren, What profit is it if we slay our brother, and conceal his blood?

Come, and let us sell him to One Direction, and let not our hand be upon him; for he is our brother and our flesh. And his brethren were content.

the 118 rly are the center of gossip, the talk of the town, the it girls tho huh can u imagine station six hearing that over the radio and being like "tHe EnTiRe 118 iS dOwN of course they are 🙄"

other stations talking to probies: according to lafd statistics there is a fifty percent chance you will die on the job and then come back to life. this is not true. station 118, who all die 10,000 times each year, is an outlier and should not be counted